The Power of Hello

Ok, let’s just get this out there now. I am white. I am also American; and I’m not just “born in America” American, I am born, bred, raised (trained) American. When I walk I either look down or look people straight in the eye. I don’t make a conscious effort to smile at someone when I walk by. It’s not that I am mad or closed off or trying to appear tough, I just usually go about my business and don’t think about the people I’m passing by. 

When I go to the grocery store in America I will sometimes say “Hi” to the person at the checkout line, and I will always return the obligatory “How are you?” with the equally obligatory response, “Fine, thanks. And you?” But that response comes more out of 24 years of training than it does from a deep seated place of caring about that person. I wouldn’t describe myself as cold or rude, and I don’t think those that know me would either, I’m just American. Busy, in a hurry, American.

Now, I’m an American living in Haiti and I’ve learned some valuable lessons. Don’t drink the water. Always wash your vegetables twice. Ants can infiltrate the microwave to eat your food. But I think the most important lesson I have learned is the power of hello, or bonjou if you will. This is a lesson I didn’t learn until mid-November, 3 1/2 months after I had arrived. In our Creole lessons our instructor doesn’t just teach us Creole, he also teaches us about the nuances of Haitian culture. One of the things he told us was the importance of saying hello and greeting people before you ever ask for anything. It is an extreme sign of rudeness to just walk up and ask for what you want without saying “hello” first. Not “how are you,” you must say “hello.” Simple right? And I bet you’re judging me for a)thinking it took me three and a half months to figure this out and b) for being a heartless person who never says hello. However, before you judge me, think about how many times you are at a restaurant or a store and you just ask for what you want without a smile and a “hello.” Now think about having to buy that thing or order that item in a different language. Trying to translate what you want in English into Creole all while counting out your money and converting the money from gourdes to dollars in your head to see how much it costs! It is easy to forget the “hello.”

This revelation has done so much to change my outlook. Before I walked down the street and got hard, cold stares and felt intimidated and unwelcome. I felt like the marchans (ladies selling produce on the sidewalks) were annoyed with me purchasing items from them. Now, as I walk down the street I throw a small smile and a bonjou (or bonswa, depending on the time of day. Bonswa = good afternoon/evening, bonjou = good morning) and without fail I receive in return a warm, friendly smile and a similar greeting. Where I once felt unwelcome, I now feel like I belong in a culture I don’t quite fully understand and one that doesn’t fully know what to do with me. But, with a little smile and a small greeting, I feel more at home. 

It’s amazing the power one can find in “hello.”